Counselling & Coaching


Family and Relationship Counselling

Counselling takes place when a counsellor sees a couple or individual in a private and confidential setting to explore a difficulty they have, a distress they may be experiencing or perhaps their dissatisfaction with their relationship or loss of a sense of direction and purpose.

Relationship counselling can help a couple find a way forward in their relationship when difficulties arise. The counsellor can help a couple or family towards a better understanding, communication and sharing. Even when this is not possible, the family or relationship counsellor can help couples or individuals to understand what has happened and work out what they need to do.

By listening attentively and patiently the counsellor can begin to perceive the difficulties from the individual’s point of view and can help them to see things more clearly, possibly from a different perspective. Counselling is a way of enabling choice or change or of reducing confusion.  It does not involve giving advice or directing a person to take a particular course of action. Counsellors do not judge or exploit in any way.

In the counselling sessions you will be encouraged to talk freely and openly about your experiences and feelings in a way that is rarely possible with friends or family. Counselling can help you to understand your feelings and to move on with your life.

Annie Wilson and Beryl Matthews work as Family and Relationship counsellors in Norfolk and Suffolk.  They have worked for many years with couples, family groups and individuals to help people understand how their relationships got into difficulty and to work out the best way forward for them. For more information contact Annie or Beryl at www.relationshipcounsellingnorfolk.co.uk

Ursula Harben has 25 years experience as a Systemic Therapist, working collaboratively with families in almost every problematic context imaginable. She also works with   couples and individuals, and has a particular interest in conflict resolution. She is also a member of The United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy(UKCP).

What is the systemic approach?

The systemic approach regards the communication that goes on between people as their most important activity. Every human act is an act of communication that is successful or unsuccessful in helping people to make sense of their world and enabling them to get on with life. A systemic therapist is less interested in what goes on inside a person’s mind or brain and more interested in how that person exists in their social world. Emotions are such a vital part of being human that their proper management is of the essence when relationships change or break down. The systemic therapist can help couples to manage a more successful parting.

In the context of family breakdown, it will often be the case that the clients’ desire to co-parent in the future is every bit as important as the achievement of a financial settlement that is fair. Yet whether or not children are involved, clients may be completely unprepared for the end of a relationship in which so much emotion has been invested:  an enormous sense of loss can be accompanied by anger and immense frustration. If clients are willing, the systemic approach can help with endings so that the management of future connections is less traumatic and can even be positive, in particular for the children of the partnership.

One advantage of a successful intervention of this kind is the rapidity of the process so that there is little prospect  of numerous sessions.

Coaching

Coaching during a divorce can help you stay calm, focused and in control of yourself. Divorce Coaching offers the time and space to reflect upon a situation; to learn from past mistakes and to plan a better future.

Coaching is not counselling and it is not therapy.  A divorce coach can help you with the emotional side of a relationship breakdown or divorce.  Coaching looks at the present and encourages you to learn from previous behaviour; developing strategies that will help you manage the challenge of the process itself - and plan for a better future.  Coaching will not only help you to clarify what you want now, but also to focus on your longer term objectives.

Bespoke coaching is designed to empower you and enable you to give clear and firm instructions to your legal adviser.

If you have children, it is important that you continue to communicate well with your former partner or spouse.  Coaching will show you how to remain calm; manage your emotions and resolve any disputes.

Professional coaching will help to increase your self-esteem and confidence when the reality of divorce or relationship breakdown have left you feeling low and alone.  You will find the strength to feel positive about your future.

Mary-Jane Kingsland is a specialist Divorce Coach. She offers support and understanding to our clients. For more information contact Mary-Jane at www.green-light.uk.com